Thursday, February 23, 2012

On Leave....

I am taking leave.  Leave from my computer.  I have decided the best thing for me and my family is to walk away from my computer habits.  I spend too much time pinning on Pinterest, browsing Facebook and too many hours catching up on Google Reader.  I won’t even start with how much time I spend checking email and time on My Fitness Pal!!

I am not giving up on my weight loss.  I am hoping this helps me gain focus where it needs to be.  I don’t know how long my absence will be, but I just need to change some things up in my life.

I hope to return a healthier person, mentally and physically.

Take Care,
Amber

Monday, February 20, 2012

SCC Week Seven Update

Spring Chick Challenge (SCC) Week Seven Challenge Update:

1.       Commit to a NSV (non scale victory) to be assessed at the start and the conclusion of the challenge.   My size 14 jeans I currently wear will be loose and falling off!  I will be wearing a size 12!!
I feel like I am getting no where, but I am determined to keep moving along and attempting to move forward.  I did however have a NSV, My 14’s I wear most often are loose, and due to my body shape they fall off my rear when they are worn below my belly.  But due to the size of my belly right now they won’t stay on top of my tummy at all.  I really have needed to find a belt.  Last time I tried on my belts from my closet (which I have not been able to wear since having kids) I was disappointed that I couldn’t wear them.  Me and my stubbornness refused to go out and buy a larger size. 
Valentines I was going out on a date with the hubster and I decided to try on one of my belts.  I was able to wear it at the largest size.  It was a little tight, but it kept my pants in place while we were dancing.  I tried on a second belt and it fits even better!  So I am happy for this small step of progress!  It has helped lift my spirits a bit.

2.       Commit to a set of nutrition parameters and track via MyFitnessPal
o        I will aim for 1200/day and adjust according to my exercise  tracking via MyFitnessPal (add me as your friend—ambreee)
o        I will drink at least 64 oz of water a day.
Eating this week was not so great.  I didn’t track as often as I should have and I ate way too many goodies.  Today I am back on track with logging my food. I did great on water.  I figure if it is one small thing I can do for myself, I can chug my water!

3.       Commit to a set of exercise parameters. These can be as loose or as flexible as you feel work for your personality, schedule, etc.
o        I will exercise 4 times a week at least 45 minutes a session
My moodiness is improving, and this morning I was able to go the gym while my husband stayed home with the kids.  It was nice to get in a solid work out with cardio and weights.

4.       Commit to blogging at least twice weekly and 1 of those times must be you check in with a complete up date on your progress. All other blogs could include new insights, results of weekly challenges, or just letting others know how you are doing.
Check..

5.       Commit to support... both giving and receiving. Check others blogs and comment as you feel motivated to do. 
Check..

Week 7 Review
·                     How was the 7th week...?  Over all, week 7, was well… ho hum….  But I am slipping out of my slump, so that is good news.
·                     Did you remain sweets free...?  No!  I thought this weeks challenge was to eat with smaller plates and utincels??? I normally eat on small plates, I didn’t change this up, but could have ate on my kids plates.
·                     How were your workouts? The ones that I actually got in were great! Would have loved to work out more though!
·                     How was your water consumption?  Great
·                     What do you think of the mini challenges?   They are good to have. Thanks!
·                     What did you do for yourself that was fun? Dancing on Valentines Day with the hubs!!I

I finally got around to changing my profile picture!! Yeah for changing out my half- grin photo.  I hope you all have a great week.  I can already tell this week is going to be much better than the previous three!!!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

... There is good news too!

Okay since I vented on my last post I only though it is fare to tell you about the good things happening in my life today as well.

-After trying to sell my car for several months I have a buyer!  Yes we had to drop the price a couple of thousand dollars, but we have a buyer and we can replenish some money in our bank account!!  I am still crossing my fingers that it all goes through.  I love my car and it is hard to let it go.  I bought it brand new in 2006, we “upgraded” to a mini-van last September so it is time to say goodbye to my lovely little wagon!

-Since my husband became a CPA, we have been searching for a new job.  He has applied many places.  The past two week have been FILLED with interviews (around 10ish!!).  He is even on round three (the job is between him and another individual!) at a job he would really like.  Tomorrow is the big day for this final interview.  We have been hoping and praying this is the job for us and that it will be a significant pay increase (especially since he has never had a raise in all four year of our marriage, even when he did get his CPA!).  Please pray for us!

-I had a nice Valentines with the hubs.  We went to dinner then went dancing.  It was a fun evening filled with Lindy hop, ChaCha and Salsa!  My mom was so gracious to babysit for us, it was wonderful to get out and just be alone for a little while.

So there are some really great things in the works at our house.  I hope your week is going well!

Mommy Blues

Okay, vent session coming on…. Just trying to gain a better perspective of how I can accomplish my weight loss goals.

Right now my number one priority is to be a mom to my kids.  Each Sunday night as I lie in bed I get out a pad of paper and write down my goals for the next week.  Some times my list is full of “To Do’s”  other times it has great aspirations about calorie counting and future work outs.  It feels good to map out my week and slip into restful slumber.

Sometimes the restful slumber is awakened in the middle of the night by my children crying out, for one reason or another.  The most recent weeks have brought my teething 15 month old son, sad in painful tears throughout all hours.  My 2 ½ year old daughter has even contributed to the all night mommy parties.  Late last week she woke up at 2:30am, we brought her to our bed in hopes she would go back to sleep and we could get some rest.  3:15am it was apparent that she was not going to go back to sleep, so we trudged out to the living room so dad could get some rest.  She wanted to talk my ear off.  It is like her brain was processing so much and she was trying to process all she had taken in the previous day.  Sleep didn’t come until 5:30am, after her chatter, moving around getting into trouble I had had enough, I insisted she lie down and go to sleep.  After some fussing, she finally did fall asleep, and so did I.

So here I am exhausted day after day, just from my duties of being a mom/dealing with my children.  I did really well for many months at getting to the gym 4-5 times a week, the losing weight has been slow even on my best weeks with exercise and eating well, which is incredibly frustrating!!

I guess I am calling out to all moms who have been where I am at.  My intentions and goals are all well meaning in my weight loss, but honestly after getting sick two weeks ago I have really been struggling.  My daughter (who is behaviorally challenging) and my son (who is incredibly curious) take every ounce of energy I seem to have most days.  I aim high when I set my weekly goals and recently I am not able to follow through.  I am trying hard to not let it get to my head and get me even more discouraged.  What has worked for you?  How do you do the balancing act with young children?

Today I was determined to get to the gym. Our day started about 6:45am.  The gym childcare opens at 8:45am, closes between the hours of 1-4pm, then opens back up from 4-8pm.  My goal is to get there usually around 9:15.  My son was having a really rough morning, which halted all plans of leaving the house.  My sister-in-law called and asked if I could watch her youngest two kids while she took the older two to the dentist.  So that delayed any gym plans.  My son was still crabby and had I gone to they gym they would have called me out anyhow.  My sister-in-law offered to take my daughter to her house to play when she came to get her kids.  I was happy I would be getting a little break and she was happy to get to play with cousins.

I decided when I went to pick her up this afternoon I would hit the gym on my way back home when the childcare opened back up.  Since my daughter is used to going in the morning, the mix of changing things up and her being tired was the perfect recipe for disaster.  She cried and started throwing a fit before we even got out of the car.  My hopes were she would warm up and be happier once we got inside.  I should have just stopped there at the car door.  The trek across the parking lot and just getting into the door of the gym were filled with crying and screaming.  I had the attention of all the people working out, I even had two people get off their work out machine trying to come to the aid of my daughter when she threw herself in front of the door as it was swinging shut and she fell to the ground.  She tantrumed on the ground yelling, “Candy! Candy!”  I am sure the people were thinking, “Yes, and now we know how your mommy got fat!”

One of the gym workers who knows my children came over and helped us back to the kid room, the crying continued, now my son decided to join in.  I kneeled on the floor trying to compromise with my daughter to get happy and play.  It wasn’t working, not one bit.  My daughter just wasn’t going to calm down.  I decided we would get out of there before my son started back up.

As we were leaving the gym a man who I have never seen before ( I am normally a morning gym rat) said, “Time for her candy?”  I replied, “Oh no, no candy for her.  We were not here long enough for that.”  My daughter actually walked out the door as I held her brother.  Once we got outside the tantrum heated back up.  She wasn’t going to move a muscle.  I swooped her up with my other arm, trying to balance her brother and my two bags, I must have looked atrocious. This is my work out, every day.  Carrying children.  Some days that is all I can get.

So here I sit utterly exhausted reflecting, “How can I make goals that are reachable for this stage my children are in.” I know this time is only a season, but sometimes I want to have and do it all.  Realistically speaking, I can not. I am educated and should know how to deal with some of my situations with my daughter, for goodness sake I have degrees in special education and early childhood development!  Why can’t I balance it all??

I have a wonderful husband who is very helpful, but he can only do so much and recently he has had to work overtime so he has even more on his plate.

So here is the good news… (and possibly the bad news)
Tomorrow is a new day and I get to start fresh again!!

So mommas out there in blog land, how do you balance the juggling act?

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Spring Chick Challenge (SCC) Week Six Challenge Update:
1.       Commit to a NSV (non scale victory) to be assessed at the start and the conclusion of the challenge.   My size 14 jeans I currently wear will be loose and falling off!  I will be wearing a size 12!!
Things are fitting about the same.  This week I have been a little bloated due to TOM, but I am hoping for a great loss next week.  I gained a pound this week and I am ready to shed it!!

2.       Commit to a set of nutrition parameters and track via MyFitnessPal
o        I will aim for 1200/day and adjust according to my exercise  tracking via MyFitnessPal (add me as your friend—ambreee)
o        I will drink at least 64 oz of water a day.
I had a few great days with eating, and some terrible days like today.  I was out of control!!!  Too much sugar, too many carbs, too out of control!!  But here is the good news, I actually tracked my whole terrible day (over 2000 calories!)  So I am back to the grindstone in the morning!  I did do great on my water though.  I think I may have even hit that goal 100%

3.       Commit to a set of exercise parameters. These can be as loose or as flexible as you feel work for your personality, schedule, etc.
o        I will exercise 4 times a week at least 45 minutes a session
I was having some real terrible emotional issues this week.  I was battling with myself to make good choices and exercise was one of them.  I made it to the gym twice, one really awesome work out and one really short work out due to my kids acting up in the childcare and me getting called back to take them out.  I think we are on the upswing with my kids, myself and my husband being sick.  My son finally cut a tooth we have been waiting on.  We only have one more to go and he will have most of his basic baby teeth.  Thank goodness because teething turns my sweet boy into a nightmare who doesn’t nap!

4.       Commit to blogging at least twice weekly and 1 of those times must be you check in with a complete up date on your progress. All other blogs could include new insights, results of weekly challenges, or just letting others know how you are doing.
I haven’t done any additional blogging this week.  I am hoping that will change too.  I just have been struggling and I haven’t really wanted to do much of anything.  I think I am doing better and I am keeping a very detailed “behavior log” This is where I am writing down every detail of my day.  In the first column I am writing my action: eating, sleeping, how my body is feeling, etc.  The second column is a comment on how I feel, or my reaction to what I ate, or just more details. 
I am looking for patterns in my eating behavior.  I have been really moody and emotional lately and I would like to see if I can find any patterns.  I guess I already know that sugar and lack of sleep contribute to my moodiness, I just would like to log it all on paper for a little while.  I am aiming for a week of detailed logging, then I will go from there.  Right now I am on day three.

5.       Commit to support... both giving and receiving. Check others blogs and comment as you feel motivated to do. 
I have read many of your blogs, and have commented on some.  I have cut back on commenting as well, but again I hope to get back in to that as well.
Week 7 Goals
  • Are you keeping them the same...?  Yes, for today I will be keeping my goals the same.
  • Are you switching it up? I will be soon, but I am working on getting things in order at home.
  • What has become like a habit?  Water!!! Yeah for being hydrated.
MINI CHALLENGE.... Eat with smaller platers and/or utensils....

Monday, February 6, 2012

SCC Week Five Update

Spring Chick Challenge (SCC) Week Five Challenge Update:
1.       Commit to a NSV (non scale victory) to be assessed at the start and the conclusion of the challenge.   My size 14 jeans I currently wear will be loose and falling off!  I will be wearing a size 12!!
2.       Commit to a set of nutrition parameters and track via MyFitnessPal
o        I will aim for 1200/day and adjust according to my exercise  tracking via MyFitnessPal (add me as your friend—ambreee)
o        I will drink at least 64 oz of water a day.
o        For the month of January I am giving up sugary sweets!
3.       Commit to a set of exercise parameters. These can be as loose or as flexible as you feel work for your personality, schedule, etc.
o        I will exercise 4 times a week at least 45 minutes a session
4.       Commit to blogging at least twice weekly and 1 of those times must be you check in with a complete up date on your progress. All other blogs could include new insights, results of weekly challenges, or just letting others know how you are doing.
5.       Commit to support... both giving and receiving. Check others blogs and comment as you feel motivated to do. 
Week 5’s Goals in addition to my goals above:
No Caffeine!!
Take my vitamins every day this week!!!

WARNING…. I am crabby!
This week was a bust! Monday I got in a really great workout, which was nice but that is about the only good that occurred.
I was sick with the flu, my son is still recovering from his ear infection and still is waiting on two more teeth to poke through.  My daughter was super crabby.  My husband is sick as well.  This morning he even woke up with pink eye. Arrghh.
I have been frustrated.  I didn’t really address any of my goals.  I was barely functioning a good part of the week. 

I lost weight, but not because I ate well and exercised.  I am sure it is because of dehydration from the loveliness of the flu.  I am sure my weight is already climbing due to my period due any day now and I am super crabby.  I am trying to put frustrations and illnesses behind me and working on stepping forward.  I am still pretty low energy, so I am not sure when I will get in my next good workout, but I am hoping to be feeling well enough by this afternoon to be moving again.
So capping last week……
  • Best moment...? When my husband called in sick.  I know sounds crazy, but I could hardly lift my own arms, let alone my kids.  He was sick too, but he was able to rest and care for the kids, as I laid dead to the world.
  • Not so great moment....? See above.
  • Any funny stories...? none.
  • Are you where you hoped you would be in this journey? No, I want to be well!  And truly break my pre-holiday weight!
  • Tell why or why not?
  • Would you like a buddy for the last 6 weeks of the challenge...? Sure, that could be fun.
  • Anybody wanna chat online sometime...? ?? maybe?
So onto week 6!
Mini-Challenge: All water all week. Modify as necessary. I think I can do this!